Saturday, September 29, 2007

I love the smell of opportunity in the morning

I've been inspired to create a mountain out of a molehill. To turn lemons into lemonade. To take the sh&t that economic life has dished me, spread it on the ground and grow some freaking roses. And I want you bears to join me.

Imagine my surprise while watching movie and a makeover while sipping my coffee and reading my Post, when on comes a commercial I hadn't seen yet? It turns out that where there is misery, there is someone seeking to profit from it. Check it: webuyuglyhouses.com. This is a venture of HomeVestors which is an American organization that, well, profits from other's misfortune.

So enter the new venture of HHV (Ms. HHV wants nothing to do with this, apparently its a bit less than ethical, but I digress): webuyyourhousepurchasemistakesinvictoria.com. My Internet professors always cautioned me to not exceed two words in a URL address, but I didn't listen with this site and if you check the "How much this blog is worth" box on the right hand side of the page you'll see how good a choice my URL address was.

Anyway, back to the scent that has permeated throughout town this morning: Opportunity. No Wait. I know. The market hasn't fallen yet. YET. But when it does we need to be ready people. That means you need to meet me with your blank check in hand now. We'll put your name on the exclusive list of only ten investors (we don't want to dilute the profits here people) SMART enough to get ready for the coming auctions and fire-sales of distressed properties. When these $400K crack shacks are selling for $150K again, we need to be ready to pounce.

Check out that HomeVestors site. Actually they have three sites: webuyuglyhouses.com, uginvests.com, and wesellluvlyhouses.com. How an uginvest in an uglyhouse can turn into luvly I'm not yet sure, but rest your pretty little minds, I will find a way! and you don't want to miss out on this once in a lifetime opportunity, I need to say that again, ONCE IN A LIFETIME OPPORTUNITY. The RE market isn't cyclical folks. The opportunities that over-leveraged boomers buying big monster homes on Bear Mountains around town won't repeat itself like it did in 1982 and 1995. This time things truly are different.

Do yourself a favour, get in on this ONCE IN A LIFETIME OPPORTUNITY to PROFIT from other peoples mistakes. After all, we need to teach people a lesson. We'd be like educators. Except we actually profit from teaching. And we'd be doing our part to make sure that the RE cycle never repeats itself again.

4 comments:

Prairieboy said...

Where do I sign up??

HouseHuntVictoria said...

1-900-sucker-born-every-minute!

Anonymous said...

Count me in! I have loads of moula just sitting in GICs, waiting to buy some mouldy ex-grow-op houses...

Oops! I omitted to mention that banks could go belly-up, taking my hard-earned funds with them!

But, you say, CDIC has me covered for $100k.....

What about we millionaires? Who covers the extra $900k????

Anonymous said...

What I am offering doesn't need insurance it's garanteed (note the misspelling so that I can't be held legally accountable)